Am I Famous Now…

Friendship is still limiting me. The charity is. I still want to get fired. Don’t get me wrong here, I love the work with the homeless people and I love my colleagues (especially since most were already friends before). But it just takes too much time of me.
I hear you all say Why don’t you just leave?, but exactly that is where the problem lays. It are friends and they kinda created the job for me. I should leave to make sure they finally start looking for someone else, now they don’t bother as they know how I rate friendship.
Job 1.

Just, there are too many things occupying me now, I have become way too busy and my life quality suffers under it big time. As soon as I come home and don’t work for the organization anymore, I pick up the design stuff (which is doing pretty fine, but where I have cut down majorly). My interests lately are alot more accessability and usability. I feel like a spunge soaken up technical input. But I do know what I am doing it for and it makes me feel great. I have become a freetime-student. And I do know I will be good in it. Really good.
Job 2.

But studying, especially hardcore the way I love it (learn everything you find) takes a long time. Time I should invest in the startup. Or should I call it startdown? Long term readers might remember my AmEx period. An important period concerning the startup.
Why? All the time I worked for Amex, I have been trying to convince some highly respected security specialists to start our own Security Consulting Company. I could convince several people, some of them I even bought out. All my private money I had saved over the years has been put into this. The project scares me because it is a huge money project. Those dudes are used to get paid quite well. We would need a huge funding, estimated $5mio for the first 2 years, hypothesising largely my future life.

But plans change. In this remote online era I was sure I could keep this project rolling, make it work remotely. I mean live in another country and still be CTO (I don’t want to be CEO).
Sadly people think differently. Although several internet companies are run with separation, my colleagues (or should I say employees) think differently. Me actively making plans to change some in life has scared several people. The startup has become a sinking ship… already : yesterday I received a mail of one of the team members, announcing his resignment due to my plans. Fair enough I say.
Will this stop me? Yes and no. I already had announced to fulfill my promises, continue building the fundaments and consult them in further stages. Obviously this doesn’t seem to be enough.

It sounds like a typical bar story to me : somebody opens a new bar and together with his first crew, mainly friends, starts a spirit. It becomes a popular place. After awhile the bar gets sold. Staff stays under the new owner, but still the place goes down. The father, the soul has left. I already notice that feeling now.
Last evening we had a conference call. The other participants show the desire to continue and even accept that my role will soon become minor, because I want so. They also prefer not to have a CTO 4000 miles away, but accept my choice. Theirs is that I continue as long as I am the UK and consult them remotely in the first weeks after.
OK, job 3.

Last but not least it looks like I’ll start an ebay shop, going to auctions and reselling to finance my move. Yes there still IS some money on the bank, but that money is/has always been part of the company engagement. An engagement I want to keep.
So, ebay job 4.

Something will have to change. If I could get fired without upsetting/disappointing it would be a major aid.